I am numb with emotion, hollow from the fall.

While I sit and wait for answers, time is ticking on the clock.

As suffocation and anxiety, try to overwhelm it all.

I am sitting in a room, alone with only myself to mock.

Question my existence, but I’ll be breathing in the end.

Question my judgement, but mistakes are the only friends I have.

Silence isn’t golden, when negativity foreshadows ever corner.

Mark my fate, but I’ll get stronger.

Too strong to let the devil inside me win.

One second.

One minute.

One hour.

It possesed all of me.

One stroke.

One moment.

One time.

What it took me for me to realize.

The picture.

The purpose.

The present.

It was my time to regain.

My power.

My capability.

My strength.

So, I said no to all of the pain.

This smile.

This positivity.

This reign.

I always knew, it was mine from the beg—-ending. 

This beginning.

This middle.

This end.

Let me find a lesson through it all.

Let me sense a little sanity within the deranged.

A shimmer of light as I fade into darkness.

“Take thy hand as I will guide the way.”

Knowing that I couldn’t see, seeing what I couldn’t know.

It being my only mistake.

Pushed into the abyss, I felt the roots pull me in.

I saw those shimmers of light dance in the air.

I had seen the shadows depart and the walls closing

In on me, as my only form of escape;

Running towards the light, feeling the bark of familiar places.

The world is ending and there’s no pretending,

So I’ll take the chance to run like the trees.

Finding a way to hold on and adapt with the change.

Heartbeat is racing, my time is fading, chasing the course of the breeze.

Let my soul raise like branches, let my body decay dancing.

Tomorrow may be forever, so let the darkness illuminate.

The instructor said,

Go home and write 

a page tonight. 

And let that page come out of you—- 

Then, it will be true.

And I just let it sit there…

At first I wasn’t sure on what I was supposed to say.

Being of African American descent, 

Some female college adolescent.

Born westernized, in denial of her culture.

Sitting in her room in a suburban neighborhood,

In a middle class society, stuck in lower-middle class America

Finally, defiantly typing this paper:

I have a plan, at the early age of nineteen. 

To be the beat of the broken Somali drums,

The feet of the thousand legs in search of homes.

I hear them calling out for me — for you — for us.

They see your denial, they can hear you too.

Just as we, they seek knowledge, ambition, and love.

Just as you want to laugh, enjoy life and be.

I have a plan to give them that dream.

We live in a world saturated with opportunities,

Yet we always want to take the easy road to happiness. 

For most that road is an unbearable, jagged path.

From what I know to be true, we only get see half of that.

Not only am I myself, but I also my parents.

Not only am I my parents, but I am my community,

Not only am I my community, but I am also a human being

And unfortunately to my understanding so are you.

You are your own choosing,

But we are all connected to each other.

Figuratively through our blood,

Literally through our globalization

And that’s what it is to be human.

As you live your life based off of popular demand,

And play your music through blasted headphones.

In the back of your mind you will think about those broken drums,

You will feel it through your bones and listen.

We are all descendants.

I can learn from you, as you — me.

But we can all learn from them, even though

We are different, distant — and somewhat more free.

This is my page for English B.

As one door closes the next one opens,

But as it opens fate slams it shut.

And I am standing in the dark hallway, misguided.

Smiling I stand there patiently,

Not really sure what I am searching for.

And I am waiting in the dark hallway, silent.

Time has been ticking away,

For some time as I have been here.

And I am pacing in the dark hallway, unrequited.

A light creaked from the darkest of doors,

Quick as I grabbed the knob before it shut.

The light gave me hope as it shined, it’s entirety.

And I am facing my fate, my opportunity, invited.

Life is not like a box of chocolates, it’s like a game of thrones. You fight your way to get to the top. You pull and push the people you love and become the person you despise the most. You get what you give, and to win you have to want it just as bad enough as they want you dead.

“Nora, snap out of it and come with me tonight!” As I awoke from my daydreaming I had realized she’d been talking to me the whole time. “Sorry Jenna, I wasn’t here.” Her eyes stung like daggers. “It’s not fine; you have been dazed out like this ever since you’ve been flagged by the Seven. If I were you –“There I went again, sucked back into my own realm of reality. I was flagged by the Seven. The Seven are a group of Monsters that live in our everyday lives, putting on masks to hide their true nature. Their true intent brought them to flag me, the opinionated girl who doesn’t like getting picked on.  I was invited by the Seven because I moved back into the creepy ole’ town of Amvern. I haven’t lived here since the third grade, and moved back my junior year staying best friends with Jenna all the while. 

Walking into the halls of Amvern High was like walking back into a story I have read before with faces I can somewhat remember. Suddenly, everyone is quickly jumping left and right, smashing into lockers trying to get away from something. It was only a line of scary-looking teenagers walking down the hall trying to appear like some kind of cult. The way people had gotten nervous around them fixed the idea in my head that this year wasn’t going to be as good as I thought. With all this thinking, I didn’t realize that all eyes were on me, that I was standing alone in the middle of the hallway like a rock that hadn’t been moved. 

The blonde one stepped out of the line, “You’re in the way, move.”

I was shocked by the way she looked at me, like I wasn’t even worth the bother of using manners.

“Are you deaf? Did you even hear what I said?” Her eyes like darts, targeting me.

Looking back at her I realized that I wasn’t going to take anything from anyone this year. Finally I spoke, “Excuse me, the word is please. So, unless you were talking to someone else you need to reiterate that one more time.”

The world stood still for a few seconds, everyone staring at me like I had signed my own death wish.

This tall guy from the Seven cut in between and introduced himself, “Hello what’s your name?”

  “Hi, I’m Nora.” I answered hesitantly.

“Hi Nora, we’re the Seven. We’re having a party at my house over by the lake if you’ d like to join?”

 Quickly, I nodded so no one thought I was completely stupid. He smiled as if he knew the answer to his question already. “Party is tonight at 7. See ya.” He grabbed the blonde by the shoulder turning her away from me, her eyes still piercing into my soul as they walked past. After the last pause of stares, everything went back to normal, if there was a normal. Taking a few breaths I had needed to move on and enjoy my day, hopefully without people staring.

Rumors started scattering that I had encountered my first run-in with the Seven, and it has only just begun. And as I was walking through the halls, I overheard some say that they were going to be posting my head on a stick as a welcoming party.

 It was only my first day back and I already had made Amvern history. 

Jenna grasped my shoulders and started to shake me. “NORA! I SWEAR ON EVERYTHING YOU ARE IN A DIFFERENT WORLD!”

I shuddered till I had processed what just happened. “Jenna I don’t even want to go, so just go without me.”

“You have to go! I can’t go without you? Why are you being so ignorant! You need to show your face.”

She was grasping my wrists, but all I could think about was the blonde and her eyes, and how she wanted to get payback. This was her chance. “No, no and no. I don’t care about “the Seven” I’m just trying to enjoy my year back in Amvern with no problems. Is that hard to ask?”

 “Well maybe you need to hang out, just you and me. Cool?”

I let out a sigh. Smiling I had agreed, finally something was going right today.

She drove out to the other side of town, promising there was a new hot spot where kids hang, ate dinner, and chilled. Twenty minutes later, we pulled up to a house caged in by a gate. This was not a dinner, this was my personal Hell. I was going to be socializing with the Demons – the Seven.  

“What the fuck, Jenna! What did I say? Does my opinion mean anything to you? I told you I didn’t want to come. Good God let’s go. Now.”

“You know what Nora, you need to relax and enjoy yourself. You’re always dazed out and you need to let loose. Do what you want, I am getting out of the car and I am going to enjoy myself. Bye.”

 She left me, sitting in front of Hell’s burning gates. I had a very bad feeling about this party, but she took the keys leaving me stranded to die for all she cared.

Finally, I pulled all the strength I had to get out of the car and walked up to the house.  Before I could knock the door had swung open and I see the handsome guy from school. “I thought you’d never make it. Come on in. I see you invited your friend Jenna.”

I laughed nervously. “Where’s Jenna anyway?” I asked.

“Oh, you know she is probably somewhere around here. This house is too big to really know.” Seven smiled.  “Let me show you the rest of the house? Like a tour?”

I shuddered at the word tour, like I was being sentenced to an eternity of pain. Pretending to feel comfortable I nodded and smiled. Any other girl would have been jumping out of their bodies to get an opportunity like this.  

 It was the longest seven minutes of my life. Finally we had returned to the foyer, and then I saw the rest of the Seven in the living room, talking amongst each other and stopped when they saw us.

“Hey Guys, this is Nora, she’ll be joining in the festivities.”  Seven said. He smiled proudly, if as I was a prize.

I felt uncomfortable for a split second as I seen their eyes, hungry. Hopefully I was here for the festivities and not the festivities. Sweat trickled my back, but was it me or did it the temperature reach one hundred?

However, no one really cared enough to show a reaction but the blonde …  if her eyes could kill, I’d be dead.

Looking up at Seven and his beautiful and chiseled jaw, I never got the chance to ask him his name. “Not to be rude, but I still don’t know your name.”

“My name is Seven and I am the leader of the Seven,”

The Seven, I thought, they sounded like a cult of some sort and they wanted me to join.  . . or die as a sacrifice. Either way I felt I would never get out of this house.

“This is One,” handshaking at the male brunette next to him. “This is two,” gesturing at the shy blonde male. “This is three,” pointing at the male, who was quiet, yet looked deadly. “She is Four.” directing at the short-haired, paranoid girl. For some odd reason she freaked me out the most.

“I know how to introduce myself, Seven.” The male grabbed my hand and kissed it. “ Nice to meet you, I am Five.”

“Uhh… nice to meet you too?” I wanted to run and wash all of the arrogant off my wrist.

All of a sudden someone grabbed my shoulder and whirled me around, and I was standing face to face with the blonde.

“I don’t really think we need an introduction, but you do need to know who I am. I’m Six. Do not, and I repeat do not get in my way again.” 

Rolling my eyes I glanced over to Seven and he was grinning from cheek to cheek.

“Well then,” I replied. “I’ll just be on my way.” I wanted to get out of there as fast as possible. Every second I was with them it felt hotter. I couldn’t breathe. I needed to find Jenna and run away as fast as possible. There was no way in Hell I was going to become anyone sacrifice.

Walking on my way out, Six opened her mouth, “So I guess she didn’t want to joining in our festivities tonight, what a waste of invitation. See you at school, nerd.” 

I stood there and cringed. Gritting my teeth, I turned and marched over to her. “ Listen here rudeness, just because you think you’re cool doesn’t mean you are. Now how ‘bout you shut your mouth for once and stop trying to scare me, it’s pathetic.” The room was silenced.

“Will you join us Nora?” Seven pleaded.

 I forgot about everyone in the room and turn a slight shade pink. “Sure, I would love to. Do you all mind?”

As smiles crept in their faces, they all agreed.

We all went outside into the dark and vast space in the backyard. We all sat in a circle while One and Five made a fire in the middle.  I sat next to Seven, the only guy who actually wanted me there.

One was the first person to go, “Now let’s start with the Never Have I Ever game, ok? Now I’ll start first:  never have I ever started something I couldn’t finish.”

Strike one; I had to take off my earrings.

Two was next, “ Well …  never have I ever been manifested with sexual thoughts?”

The circled moaned; strike two for myself so I took off my shoes. We all waited for Three who was thinking really hard on what he would say.

“Hmmm. . never. . have I ever… been  … hungry?”  We all looked perplexed, but I’d have to say I didn’t see that one coming.

One by one we all took our shirts off.

Four, being next, looked like she was going to explode with anticipation. “Never have I ever been jealous of anyone because I am perfect! Perfect people don’t need anything or anyone to make them happy!” And sliced her eyes at Seven.

WE WERE SILENCED.

I mean seriously, who of all people would say that in a game, and for one be so ignorant about it? Yet I thought to myself who was I to judge because I, unfortunately, was the only one to take off my pants. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but these all sounded familiar for some reason.

I look over to Seven who was getting red in the face. Guess, he had a fling with four? Maybe that’s why she is the way she is. Not many of them were undressed  … was I the only person being brutally honest?

Then Five breaks the silence with a laugh, which to me was more like a cackle or a declaration of his existence. Eyeing at what he was wearing, he was one hundred percent prima donna. I had never seen so much jewelry on a person before, it nearly blinded my eyes as it was shining against the fire.  He finally said, “Never have I had to ask for anything. I mean I am filthy rich and gorgeous and amazing.”< /p>

 Grinning from ear to ear, everyone’s eyes were on him, even me. Of course being the complete outcast that I am started to take my socks off. I started to feel uneasy being the only person exploited. I had never felt this isolated before. Where was everyone else? I couldn’t see anyone inside the house.

“Did everyone leave the party?” I asked.

“Maybe it’s because I have already taken them hostage?” Seven preached.

I felt pale and scared, and he looked so serious. I felt like I was going to throw up. Everyone started to bust out laughing. Confused, I got up and looked around to see people were leaving the house, including Jenna.

“It was a joke calm down, I’ll even drive you home. You need to relax more, Nora.” Seven stated.

I sat back down, more nervous than ever.

I looked at Six and she’d been staring at me the entire time. Her disgust for me was being penetrated through her eyes. The sneer she was wearing to the party matched the attitude she sprayed on, BITCH. She had announced, “NEVER have I ever done something that I didn’t want to do, ever.”  I knew she was talking about me because I was the only one down to my undergarments. That rude blondie, I hated her from the moment she tried to scare me in the hallway!

Everyone got quiet when Seven solemnly went last, “Never have I ever been jealous or angry of anything or anyone. We are all blessed to be whom and what we are.”

What did he mean who they were? My mind was starting to race but my body was frozen, literally. What was this game even for? The game made absolute no sense at all. One does all his work, Two is probably a virgin because he doesn’t think about sex, Three is always full, Four is creepy because she thinks she is perfect, Five is just plain greedy, Six is a bitch for saying that, and Seven is never jealous. Why does this not make sense?  It hit me like a ton of bricks. The Seven: Sloth, Lust, Gluttony, Pride, Greed, Wrath and Acedia. The Seven are demons; they are part of this Hell. I wanted to cry.

“What do you mean who and what we are, Seven?” Then I felt this burn in my soul after those colds words, scratching up my internal body. Quietly I put on my clothes and looked around. I had just realized that all of them had their clothes on. Was I a human target tonight? What the hell was going on? Yet it was their eyes, their devilish eyes that drew me closer to them.

I was finally snapped by Six’s cold voice from a distance, “Nora, it’s your turn. Go.”

There was not a single person around the circle; the room was almost under complete darkness. The fire getting smaller and smaller by every breath I took. Once again I drew up the courage to speak.  A veil of smoke supported my voice as I said,

“Never have I ever … been scared.” Quietly a voice answered, “… We can fix that.” 

I shrieked as the darkness turned into a fire of lava and smoke. I felt the intense heat of souls burning, tarnishing their last breath.

“What are your last words, my precious?” The demons said in unison.  

I grabbed all of the vigor I had, “I will not be frightened! Leave me the Hell alone!”

Then I was gone; disappeared into the abyss of fire.

I woke up only moments later by my alarm. I jumped up grabbing my body, making sure I wasn’t being burned to death. Letting out a sigh, I sluggishly check the time.

“Seven-forty, I’m late for my first day of school, crap!”

Checking my phone I had seven missed calls from Jenna.

“I guess I have to find my own ride today.” 

Part of me wanted to go to school, and the other part of me wanted to stay at home for the next week.

I walked up the steps of Amvern High trying to calm myself, and I sucked my last breath before opening the door. It looked exactly like I had pictured it. I was walking back into a story I have read before with faces I could somewhat remember. It started all over again, people running away and people smashing into lockers; behold the Seven turning the corner and walking up towards me.

“Oh my God. No. No. This isn’t true. Wake up Nora, this is a dream!”

Before I could run away they caught up with me.  Waiting on my death sentence, they walked right by me. I was so confused that I just kept staring. Six turns to look at me with a confused look on her face.

“ Hey do I know you, you look familiar?”

Just as quick she winked her eye and walked away.  I slowly fell to the ground and my body started to cringe in pain. The end of this game was yet to come.

Those demon spirits

Look all the same to me,

In different shapes

And different sizes for each.

It’s those eyes,

Look how they look at me.

Staring into my soul,

They want my purity.

“Stay away red eyes,

The lesser step you take.”

A shudder in my voice,

Cracking when I speak.

“I have a plan,

To be better than you seek.

I am not a follower,

The path I lay is mine to make.”

Darkened demon spirits,

Their eyes start to clear.

They quiet themsleves,

Till not a demon was feared.

Yet they walk among us,

Still wanting to mark their prey.

But I am not a follower,

That is no mistake.

Demon child or not,

The path I lay is mine to make.

If anything could be defined beautiful, then no one would be flawed.

No glance would be a second, and no form could be of awe.

If they took away the weaknesses, no strength could be as strong.

No one and nothing would be beautiful. Nothing and no one would be as raw.

Take away everything that makes me special?

Take away the color and paint me black and white?

Tell me I am unworthy of what my life has ordained?  

No, I will not surrender my name.

For I am the spirit that befriends the sky, the roots that strengthen the ground.

Hands stretching out into linear ties, the chariot that uncovers the moon and blinds the sun .

I am spirit, time, an intangible affinity.

As the flickering flames, my witnesses under this cold and unblessed night,

I will not be stripped of my identity. 

Not one struggle has lessened my focus, the center.

And never found an obstacle I did not learn from.

The questions, answered by our chosen path, our mentor.

Whether intertwined together or alone, in one direction.

Many seek the straight and narrow roads,

For only to find the them the hardest to wander through.

In many years of my searching for solidarity, found unknown.

It’s the satisfaction of it’s ending that allows me a point of view.

I see this life for what it is and what it has taught me.

For the sorrows are also minor gifts in disguise,

Accepting the gains and the losses in the process of being free.

Living for the spontaneity of tomorrow, and for the word of the wise.

We cannot seek perfection as the last piece of the puzzle, to belong.

When the perfection of the puzzle was founded by the journey, all along.

Nothing’s ever good

Nothing’s ever good enough

Nothing’s ever good enough, for you.

Fighting through this

Fighting through this coexistence

Fighting through this coexistence, for you.

Not this time, I will not close my eyes

Deteriorating, the heart beats through our lifelines.

Not this time, I won’t let you fall through the cracks.

Fatal times call for love and pleasure.

Hold on to what is good in life.

Heart keep beating, breathe and listen to me.

Not this time, not this time around.

It will not end,

It will not end like this.

Your life holds importance.

Coexist, it will not end.

Coexist, it will not end, my friend.

It will not kill you, together we can cure this.

I am invisible to you, an amount of nothing you view.

You may see me from a distance, but it’s not the way I see you.

Sometimes I hold myself up high, then I try to run away.

So, I’m sorry that I am going through a mixed feelings phase.

I love you when you don’t, and then the feeling’s vice versa.

While you’re waiting on an answer, I end up moving at a doubtful pace.

I try my best and in the end you’ll still be what I want.

All these feelings swelled in my mind, just trying to spit them out.

I hope you try to see past my translucent exterior,

‘Cause no one wants to die an inferior, to not be enough.

Please realize I would like a chance to play this part.

My indecisiveness may try to break your heart,

But I hope this love mark makes you willing to open your eyes.

You’ve been lost.

You’ve been confused.

You’ve been dazed for days upon days.

Caught in the middle of every fire.

There was no way out but through each phase.

Kept yourself bottled and pushed the throttle,

Never to consider the casualties.

Never considered the person at stake.

Never knew you were hurting me.

You’ve always held your tears.

Hidden your face from your darkest fears.

Fought for your voice every time.

Never told you I was proud of you,

Cause you did what you had to do.

Saved a palace behind the walls,

That you built up in case I’d fall.

And I’ve always never considered the casualties.

Never have I considered the person at stake.

Never really knew I was hurting me.

I thank you for what you’ve done for me,

But I think I’m old enough to hold my ground.

Never will I be scared to try.

Borrowing the foundation from these walls,

To build the wings I need to fly.

Not sure if I will keep myself from danger,

However I will keep my word; it’s just a matter of time.

The danger will always capture the beauty I seek.

It is all thanks to you that I am who I am,

You have eternally marked your scars.

I give my life to you, other me.

You take advantage of me and that was your biggest disadvantage.

To leave such a mark, might have more bark than bite.

As my attention drops, the percentage of interest is lost.

You will never mentally take me hostage, and can never try.

Even though there’s some guilt built up inside of me.

Even though your intentions had broke many rules.

You must have been a fool to play this game with the Queen.

Nothing left to do but to play charades, my favorite mental gain.

You’re living like a fuck up, with nothing on the mind but to give up.

That works for me.

That’s what I like to see.

There are no tears in my eyes, you have lost all your chances.

It’s fucked up way to be, but fuck ups learn the harder way.

Fuck me once shame on you, but don’t hope for any more.

You’re outta luck when the time strikes out, with nothing left but the core. 

If you ever fuck up twice, then this smell of your blood will stain the concrete’s appetite.

This is the threat of all threats you’ll never get, but hope and pray you change your course.

Our days will never end,

Our days will never die.

So many instilled memories to harness,

As our souls are forced to fly.

Decaying bodies, interconnected by the Earth.

My love for you surpasses this life. 

Till death doing us part will not suffice

The undying love I have for you,

Even in the afterlife.

To say goodbye, is another hello.

My last glance, will forever my be my first.

Only through your eyes will this soul live forever.

Through the pain and the smiles, befriended by time.

They may say till the day they die will they love.

But they do not hold their hearts as one.

Our days will never end,

Our days will never die.

Forevermore my darling, will I stay your bride.

Our days will never end,

Our days will never die.

Till death do us live, and our love never die.